How Your Childhood Is Still Running Your Life

The Invisible Script (And How to Rewrite It)

Have you ever noticed how life seems to repeat itself no matter how much inner work you do? You change jobs, relationships, habits, even cities, yet somehow the same emotional themes keep popping up. The same doubts. The same frustrations. The same feeling that the universe has picked a role for you and refuses to recast it. It can feel personal, like reality itself has a memory longer than yours.

Your parents or caregivers wrote your code.

 Most of us are living inside an invisible script that was written very early on, long before we had any say in it. That script was installed during childhood, largely by our parents or caregivers, and it quietly shapes how we perceive ourselves, how we expect to be treated, and what we believe is possible for us. Until you become aware of it, you don’t question it. You just perform it.

Your parents didn’t just teach you manners or values. They shaped the emotional frequency you learned to operate from. The baseline feeling you associate with being alive. Were you safe or on edge? Celebrated or tolerated? Encouraged or doubted? That emotional environment didn’t just influence you. It programmed you. And unless you consciously cultivate a stronger, different frequency as an adult, that early programming tends to win. This is why people so often realise, with horror or humour, that they’ve become their parents in ways they swore they never would.

Your subconcious has two back-doors

This happens because your subconscious mind was wide open in childhood, and your parents had constant access through two very effective pathways. The first is relaxation. Children spend a lot of time in slower brain states, the kind associated with imagination, play, rest and drifting off to sleep. These states act like a direct bridge to the subconscious. When your parents spoke to you, reacted to you, or treated you a certain way during these moments, their messages went straight in, no critical thinking required.

The second pathway is emotional charge. Emotion is the native language of the subconscious, and it responds to intensity, not logic. It doesn’t care whether an experience was positive or negative. It only registers how strongly you felt it. Moments of joy, fear, shame, praise or rejection become deeply embedded when the emotional charge is high enough. One emotionally intense experience can quietly install a belief that runs your life for decades. This is why we overthink and ruminate on bad experiences again and again, and find it hard to do the same with good experiences.

Over time, these relaxed, emotionally charged moments form a central pattern, a core feeling about who you are and how life treats you. That feeling hums in the background of everything. And here’s where it gets confronting. Reality mirrors it back to you with impressive consistency. If you were doubted, you encounter situations that make you doubt yourself. If you were criticised, life feels harsh and unforgiving. If you were ignored, you keep feeling invisible. Not because the universe is cruel, but because it is efficient. It reflects what you already expect at a deep, emotional level.

Once this core pattern is established, reality has two main jobs. The first is to magnify it, using people, circumstances and events to reinforce the familiar feeling. The second is to maintain it. Change disrupts energetic equilibrium, so when you try to shift, life often pushes back. Old patterns reassert themselves. Resistance shows up. This doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. It means the system is responding.

Rewrite that code yourself

The good news is that this script is not permanent. Your subconscious mind doesn’t operate on linear time, which means past experiences are still energetically active. It also can’t tell the difference between a real experience and a vividly imagined one. That gives you a way in. By revisiting emotionally charged childhood moments in a relaxed state and consciously rewriting them, you can create a new emotional imprint that competes with the old one. When the new emotional charge becomes strong enough, the system updates.

1. Relax: Enter a deeply relaxed or meditative state where your brain can shift into Alpha or Theta waves. This opens the bridge to your subconscious. Use a binaural or what have you to achieve this.

2. Re-experience: Recall a specific, powerful childhood memory that represents the strongest instance of your core negative feeling (e.g., being ignored, feeling like a burden, being doubted). Do not just remember it; allow yourself to re-experience the event in your mind like a movie.

3. Recreate: As the memory plays out, consciously intervene and alter it. Recreate the event to be the exact polarity - the positive opposite of what you actually felt. If the memory is one of feeling like a burden, rewrite it so that your parents make you feel cherished and celebrated. If it's a memory of being doubted, recreate it so they express unwavering confidence in you. Feel the positive emotions of this new version as intensely as possible.

This is not about denying the past or pretending it didn’t happen. It’s about alchemising your subconscious. You are giving your nervous system a new reference point for what is possible, safe and true.

You are not failing at life. You are simply running an old program. And once you see it for what it is, you can stop being the character trapped in the story and start being the one who writes the next chapter.